Evil Coffee
XoreYou sleep late one day and wake up to belatedly realize that you need to be in the office to give a presentation at an important division meeting in no less than 5 minutes from Right Now. Your rational mind says that there is no way (in hell?) that you’re going to get there in time. You wander into the kitchen where your coffee pot waits with five day old coffee. The automatic clock has been reheating it every morning for two hours, and evaporation attrition has turned what was once five cups of hot liquid into something more closely resembling two.
It must be noted at this point that you are confident the aforementioned coffee has obtained demonic powers, possibly including (but clearly not limited to) the summoning minor devils, plunging the world into eternal darkness, and tearing the fabric of space-time to allow temporal drift. It occurs to you that the latter might be handy for getting to work in time.
The ghostly spectre of a recently deceased housefly buzzes around your head, it’s drowned corpse floating limply atop the Evil Coffee: mute testimony to it’s potency. (Does it get bonus points for it spilling the blood of innocents and encorporating their corpses into it’s garb?)
Do you:
- Drink the Evil Coffee?
- Phone in to work that you need the day off to perform excorcism on a kitchen appliance (Is there anything in employee benefits for this? If not, can we add that to the budget?)
- Screw it, mad dash for work
Decisions. =(
July 25th, 2006 at 7:23 pm
Better safe than sorry is my motto, so I’d go with C.
July 26th, 2006 at 4:04 pm
I already have the holy water, the sacrfical goat and a few virgins in tow….
So yeah, I guess my answer is b.
July 27th, 2006 at 7:25 am
The text “floating” in the coffee intruiges me. Sure, it could be the text from the monitor reflecting off the light that shines the coffee, creating a tricky picture from just the right angle. But I call shenanigans.
I’m with Morvock on this one. B. You don’t want to show up to work possessed with a polturgist.
July 28th, 2006 at 10:33 pm
i’d go with A. evil coffee is better then no coffee.
speaking of coffee i pulled my first true allnighter the other day. then drank 12 cups of coffee to keep myself awake. unfortunatly i think i overdosed on caffeen(i didn’t think it was possible but it is).
^^that was random
July 29th, 2006 at 12:56 pm
Finally, someone with a little sense. Well said: evil coffee is better than no coffee, and it’s much better at waking you up than regular coffee. It’s harder to go back to sleep with a nasty taste in your mouth.
burdman: It was a reflection shot of my monitor off the top of my coffee. No shenanigans involved. I like how the cup is out of focus so that I could get the monitor text very sharp. Unfortunately, when scaling the image down, you lose the text. Oh well.
August 1st, 2006 at 7:58 am
A) Drink the coffee!
August 5th, 2006 at 10:49 pm
‘mudez, are you just starting a CS degree? On average, I stay up all night more often than I get 10+ hours of sleep.
I say, nix the coffee, finish the presentation, and after it’s done take a break and go to a coffee shop/7-11 and buy a double-expresso/caffe-mocha/Beaver Buzz Energy Drink.
Cafe Mocha’s are fantastic- they have lots of sugar AND caffeine.
And Beaver Buzz, well, that stuff’s just delicious. Saskatoon Berry is BERRY flavoured for chrissakes. Mmm.